In The Beginning

Humanity was a mistake. It was never meant to happen. This may come as a shock to some readers, but you were never part of the grand scheme of things.

When humans first “happened,” it was considered nothing more than luck that they could survive in the harsh environment on Arcturis, where they were put to work harvesting the crop that grew in the thick, murky marshlands of the open country. In fact, it was sheer luck that humans ever “happened” to begin with.

An aspiring young biological engineer by the name of Rak’Shenuk was in his last year at the School of Universes when he created humanity. He had decided to reproduce an experimental farm animal for his final project, but alas, his roommate had something else in mind.

After first consulting Rak’Shenuk’s girlfriend, Sharai-Nei’Huma, and then the Director of the School of Universes, Rak’Shenuk’s roommate began to plan one of the biggest pranks in the history of the esteemed university. One evening after Rak’Shenuk had been working on his project, his roommate, Pargut Ha’Buk, saw his chance. Rak’Shenuk burst into the dorm room singing, and went into great detail about how wonderfully his work was coming along. Pargut Ha’Buk suggested that they celebrate, and personally saw to it that Rak’Shenuk became incredibly intoxicated before he himself left the dorm.

Pargut Ha’Buk located the laboratory Rak’Shenuk was working in and quietly let himself in. He spent several minutes searching for the test tubes Rak’Shenuk had told him about minutes before, the ones that he knew contained the experiment in its earliest stages. Finally he found them along the back wall of the laboratory. Carefully, he lifted one of the long, thin tubes out of the case and shook it before him. He watched the contents swirl around for several long minutes before he continued. With great care he opened the tube and placed it, upright, back in the case from whence it came.

He then proceeded along the wall to a cabinet, which he had to force open with his vibroblade. Inside were tubes and beakers filled with various strange chemicals, hypodermic needles, plastic and rubber tubing, and several small electronic devices for what purpose Pargut Ha’Buk was uncertain. Reaching for a test tube that contained the chemical he had planned to use, Pargut Ha’Buk accidentally knocked over a beaker containing a strange viscous liquid he could not identify. The beaker shattered and the liquid spread across the floor. Pargut Ha’Buk wiped it up with a hand towel he found by the sink and went back to the cabinet. He found the tube he had been looking for, placed it in his pocket, and closed the cabinet.

Returning to the table and the case containing Rak’Shenuk’s “experiment,” he removed the test tube from his pocket and from another pocket pulled an eyedropper, which he filled with the strange chemical. He then proceeded to drop the chemical from the eyedropper into the open test tube he had left in the case. That done, he replaced the rubber cap, closed and sealed the glass case, and left the laboratory.